Blog 4: Random thoughts and musings

 Random musings. I actually have a few ideas, like 'what if' ideas, but I forgot. I thought about one just now and I forgot. I thought about one yesterday and I can't recall it. 

On the other hand, I sort of had the anxiety? / boredom? / uncertainty? - attack? yesterday. Couldn't sleep at 3 plus at night, with the kids sleeping and the wife pumping milk and breast-feeding, and thinking about she who must not be named here. I think about her all the time, to the point where I feel that she is my true love. But I did not fight for her. And I can't too. I am in the wrong. And I lack the ability to. 

Anyway, random thoughts no.1.

An overreliance on the good things in the future. Where there's clean energy, like hydrogen fuel, and everything is automated, and everything is provided. So...there shouldn't be class distinction? But knowing how humans make everything dystopian eventually, there should be. It's how governments becomes ultra-powerful. And everything is controlled. Money is digitised so it could be cut off easily by those in the know or in cahoots or with power. Something like that. Ultimate control. What will humans be like anyway? To have everything provided? Then they will be free to focus on other things. But humans don't respond well in this kind of situation. Take me for example. One needs direction in life, that's for sure. Work provides that, whether good or bad. I have no work. There you go. So, maybe humans will focus on the abstract. Like the arts, or writing, or creating something, but AI will provide most of the things one can think of. AI will handle most of the jobs. And they don't need anything. We do. So what do we do? Creative, original thoughts. Abstract. Ideas on how to make the world a better place. That being the currency. That is all I have on that thread of thought for the moment. Quite interesting actually. I will have to refer to this in the future. 

Random thought no.2

I had this when my son was playing with me, we were sort of roughing around on the bed. It came to me and I remember wanting to write it down, which I did a bit too late and with much forcing. And now I can't recall it. I can't. Anyway, I guess that's all from me for today. Will continue writing poems for fun, just going with the flow. I really have to start writing stories soon. Haha. As bad as I am at it. 

Yes, finished watching Dark Water again yesterday. Second time. The woman is a divorcee. Just remembered. She's on medication, goes to the psychiatrist. She has a daughter. She is anxious. She sacrificed herself for her child. (I am not that noble, I think). What else? Why did I feel like watching it again? I love a good horror that's for sure. I like the idea of the water just getting everywhere too. I like the idea of mold. Black mold. Perhaps that will make a good story. The mold. Lol. 

I feel better after writing things down. Trying to be as anonymous as I could to protect myself and yet with the hope that it will be read to satisfy the narcissist in me. My number one wish would be to reconnect with her. I would love to talk to her again. She lights up my life, that's for sure.